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Til Tuesday "On Sunday" |
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Strange update for today. I have still have two papers to do, and it's 1:15 a.m., so I need to book it. Anyway, this kid I talked to for years, Matt "Sko", who lived in Georgia and now attends North Central College, attended the same high school as my cousin Mike. For some reason we ended up becoming "online" friends... I hadn't talked to him in quite some time, and apparently he didn't know I was gay.
I have never been involved in any dispute like this before. I never thought I would be. C'est la fucking vie. The screenname I put up is not his screenname.
Context: Matt had found someone on myspace that attended N. Central who went to Lemont High. I went and found out who the person was, and that's where the conversation starts out. The "little girl" he refers to later is Kimmie, who IMed him with her words of love halfway through this argument. His references to "being a fucking failure, etc" allude to Kimmie's IMs to him. Enjoy. Or something.
CmonVogue1009: dude.
CmonVogue1009: how the hell is N. Central?
Sko 1: not too shabby
Sko 1: not gonna lie
CmonVogue1009: thats fifteen minutes from my house.
Sko 1: i talked to someone who went to your school
CmonVogue1009: yeah?
CmonVogue1009: lauren dearcangelis? mandy kilinskis?
Sko 1: ummmm
Sko 1: it was on myspace
CmonVogue1009: oh, i figured it was someone from N Central
CmonVogue1009: you should get on facebook
Sko 1: i canty
Sko 1: it wont let me
CmonVogue1009: oh really? my friend from N. Central just got it today
Sko 1: it wont let most people
CmonVogue1009: that fucking sucks
Sko 1: wont send them a confirmation email
Sko 1: lemme check and asee who this bitch is
CmonVogue1009: haha, alright.
CmonVogue1009: mandy kilinskis?
CmonVogue1009: she was a grade younger than me
Sko 1: http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=10633635&Mytoken=14F45F70-E4F5-11DE-042BFE933FF7FE3888945247
CmonVogue1009: oh the myspace chick
CmonVogue1009: let me look
CmonVogue1009: ummm does she have a name
Sko 1: beets me
CmonVogue1009: because "touch me..." is probably not her birth name
CmonVogue1009: she acts like lauren dearcangelis
Sko 1: possibly
CmonVogue1009: and a bunch of my friends commented on her wall
CmonVogue1009: its just been confirmed
CmonVogue1009: its lauren dearcangelis. she is a sexy vixen. if i were straight, i'd totally hit her.
Sko 1: what year
CmonVogue1009: shes a freshman right now
CmonVogue1009: shes totally my bud
Sko 1: she's a freshman?
CmonVogue1009: yep.
Sko 1: hm
Sko 1: i don't think i know her by name
Sko 1: or by face
CmonVogue1009: by ass, however
Sko 1: thers a lot of those
Sko 1: if i were straight?
CmonVogue1009: its been awhile since ive talked to you
CmonVogue1009: yeah i'm gay
Sko 1: you're gay
CmonVogue1009: though theres still something objectively hot about females in porn
CmonVogue1009: i am sure gay
CmonVogue1009: i know, can you believe it
Sko 1: that's wrong on so many different levels
CmonVogue1009: haha, what do you mean
Sko 1: you're pretty much the horniest guy i know
CmonVogue1009: yeah
Sko 1: and you want to plug guys' rectums
Sko 1: instead of girls
CmonVogue1009: i think back in high school it was a lot of pent-up sexuality that i didnt know how to direct
CmonVogue1009: well
CmonVogue1009: its really not like that
CmonVogue1009: and i still havent done that
CmonVogue1009: everything else, yes
Sko 1: you like giving men blow jobs
CmonVogue1009: it happens.
Sko 1: but, you enjoy it
CmonVogue1009: umm. yes. correct.
CmonVogue1009: thats how it works.
Sko 1: that's just
Sko 1: wrong
CmonVogue1009: um
CmonVogue1009: that does a lot of good saying its "wrong"
CmonVogue1009: are you serious?
Sko 1: ugh that's so disgusting
CmonVogue1009: i cant believe gayness is a fucking novel idea to you
CmonVogue1009: its not disgusting to most straight people
Sko 1: in my opinion it's one of the most loathsome things otu there
CmonVogue1009: that opinion would be worth regard if there were any intellectual reasoning to it
Sko 1: right
Sko 1: men and women were meant to have intercourse
Sko 1: which is why men have a penis, and women have a vagina
CmonVogue1009: well. sorry you feel like that, i think youre cool
Sko 1: it works, it makes sense
CmonVogue1009: well thats how people are meant to be born
Sko 1: men are not supposed to put their penis inside of other men
CmonVogue1009: thats not how "people are meant to be"
Sko 1: i'm pretty sure it is
CmonVogue1009: im almost certain it isnt
Sko 1: well that's because you enjoy plugging other guys
CmonVogue1009: wow. you are a bigot.
Sko 1: but child molesters also don't see anything wrong with molesting children
CmonVogue1009: thats right, im a child molestor
CmonVogue1009: im sorry youre freaked out that you enjoyed talking about blowjobs with a gay man
CmonVogue1009: and im sorry youre freaked out at that realization
Sko 1: so, you like giving head
Sko 1: to guys
Sko 1: why would you do that
CmonVogue1009: really, i dont
CmonVogue1009: i like getting head
CmonVogue1009: it depends
CmonVogue1009: if i really like the guy, i like doing it to him
CmonVogue1009: but i avoid it
Sko 1: you like squirting into guys mouths
CmonVogue1009: definitely
Sko 1: i feel like i need a shower now
Sko 1: i feel dirty
CmonVogue1009: great.
CmonVogue1009: i mean, you certainly dont have any homoerotic tendencies. talking about how turned on you are to other guys
CmonVogue1009: jacking off with other guys online
Sko 1: say this again?
CmonVogue1009: dude, you did both of those things
Sko 1: how turned on i am to other guys
CmonVogue1009: you told me to talk to some girl online you were cybering with (this is a long time ago), and you told me you were jacking off. actually, regularly you told me when you were jacking off, when you were about to cum, and when you came
Sko 1: so, i was jacking off to a girl
Sko 1: and that somehow means i have homoerotic tendancies
CmonVogue1009: while you told me you specifically went out of your way to tell me you were jacking off and how turned on you were
CmonVogue1009: we discussed regularly what we wanted to do to girls
CmonVogue1009: and that confidence has a homoerotic quality to it
CmonVogue1009: its fucking textbook.
Sko 1: right
Sko 1: so, i have homoerotic tendancies
CmonVogue1009: i dont know if you do now, but what that was years ago was homoerotic
CmonVogue1009: i wouldve never thought it was then
Sko 1: ya know if you look at this psychologically
Sko 1: you feel guilt because you're gay, so you're trying to tell me i have tendancies to make yourself feel better
Sko 1: it's textbook
CmonVogue1009: i "feel" like im dealing with an infant who is so uncomfortable with sexuality that he allows himself to "hate" other people because he doesnt know how to handle his own discomfort with his own sexuality
Sko 1: i don't necessarily hate you
Sko 1: i just think you're a very fucked up individual
CmonVogue1009: your determined callousness makes you pretty fucked up
CmonVogue1009: you want to have a problem with sexuality, matt
Sko 1: i don't think i want to have a problem with anything
CmonVogue1009: then why would you care if someone was gay
Sko 1: i think my background and my upbringing make it difficult for me to view what you do as morally acceptable
CmonVogue1009: i think theres a time when intellect should take over and not dependence on "upbringing" to justify your argument
Sko 1: i think you are wrong, in every sense of the word
CmonVogue1009: "...mapping one's own experiences onto what is usually perceived as a dichotomous self-label (heterosexual or homosexual, gay or straight) is not always a simple task, and some individuals become confused or uncertain about their sexuality. Because of the stigmatized status of homosexuality, such individuals may experience anxiety at the prospect of being labeled gay or lesbian, which they may externalize in hostility or overt aggression toward gay people." (from the Journal of Social Issues)
Sko 1: you liberals are all about intellect, but you rely only on primal instincts
CmonVogue1009: what the fuck does that mean?
CmonVogue1009: you rely on preconceived misconceptions
CmonVogue1009: and stigma.
Sko 1: ok
Sko 1: you are horny
Sko 1: and theres a guy
Sko 1: so you plug his hole
Sko 1: thats instinct
Sko 1: not intellect
CmonVogue1009: i would say you wanting to "plug" a girl is pretty instinctive
Sko 1: intellect would tell you, hmm, why do you think i have a penis, and she has a hole
CmonVogue1009: ummm no
Sko 1: with no other purpose than to stick it in
CmonVogue1009: that would imply that people only have sex to have kids
CmonVogue1009: which is obviously not the case
CmonVogue1009: im intellectual enough to know thats true
CmonVogue1009: *not true
CmonVogue1009: and my friend kimmie says she wants you to accept her IMs
Sko 1: am i not accepting them?
CmonVogue1009: so she says
Sko 1: um
CmonVogue1009: tennischica something
Sko 1: i never didn't
Sko 1: let me check the settings
CmonVogue1009: no shes got it now
CmonVogue1009: your "arguments" could be applied to everything
Sko 1: i think you're like the 10th person who has tried tellign me i'm gay
CmonVogue1009: "you eat cookies? i think thats fucking loathsome. you eat because you want to be healthy."
CmonVogue1009: ill be damned.
Sko 1: your friend is a rather pleasant person
CmonVogue1009: i guess she doesnt like people who freak out at the mention of gayness
CmonVogue1009: who are scared of it
Sko 1: yea apparently not
CmonVogue1009: who feel "dirty" when hearing about it
Sko 1: i don't think i said i hate you did i?
Sko 1: no, nor did i tell you to fuck off or go to hell
CmonVogue1009: i think you think its deplorable to be gay
CmonVogue1009: which is good enough
Sko 1: nor did i tell you you're be a failure the rest of your life
Sko 1: no, i disagree with your lifestyle
Sko 1: and like you said earlier, i still think you're cool
Sko 1: your friend attacks me for thinking im better than other people, yet thats what she's doing
Sko 1: attacking me because she thinks she is a better person
Sko 1: possibly because she's more open minded
CmonVogue1009: she thinks youre a tool for talking like an abusive hick stepfather to someone you consider your friend
Sko 1: i'm set in my ways, i'm not asking you to change, nor should she ask me to change, nor should she insult me for the sole purpose of insulting
Sko 1: you're a big boy, i htink you can handle it dont you?
CmonVogue1009: what do you mean she "shouldnt"? you invite insults and subjective commentary by being so determinedly antagonistic and homophobic
Sko 1: i'm not homophobic, i just don't agree with anything you do
CmonVogue1009: then you probably "shouldnt" verbalize [that disagreement] if you really arent offended or threatened by me
Sko 1: so by her insulting me randomly, why would i want to agree with you in any way whatsoever/
CmonVogue1009: what good are you doing?
Sko 1: that's sure inviting me to change
CmonVogue1009: i didnt tell her to do that
CmonVogue1009: i told her the convo i was having
CmonVogue1009: i didnt hire her
CmonVogue1009: she did it on her own
Sko 1: so she really is as stupid as she sounds
Sko 1: bercause im not having any of my homophobic friends send you hate mail
CmonVogue1009: yes thats really stupid of her to tell someone she thinks theyre being deplorable when theyre specifically being an asshole
Sko 1: i think that's just ridiculous
CmonVogue1009: and youre deciding she sounds "stupid"
Sko 1: you and i are having an argument, or discussion or whatever
Sko 1: and we have kids jumping in like they know mnore than they do
Sko 1: that shows maturity
CmonVogue1009: clearly youre the mature one.
Sko 1: did i invite my friends in?
Sko 1: i'm simply disagreeing with you on things
CmonVogue1009: if im having a heated conversation and i tell my friends about it, thats not immature
Sko 1: plus, it's just inconceivable to me how someone could do that and enjoy it
CmonVogue1009: no you arent
Sko 1: it baffles the mind
CmonVogue1009: it wasnt a matter of disagreeing
CmonVogue1009: i said i'm gay
CmonVogue1009: and you said "i think thats disgusting"
Sko 1: right
Sko 1: so, i insulted your lifestyle
CmonVogue1009: i wasnt offering it to you like you were the judge of reason/my life
Sko 1: and your choices
CmonVogue1009: which you thought you were
Sko 1: but i dont think i calld you disgusting
Sko 1: did i insult you directly?
Sko 1: any more than you did me?
Sko 1: because, i think you called me an infant
CmonVogue1009: insulting my lifestyle is insulting me, yes
CmonVogue1009: right
Sko 1: and i only called you gay
CmonVogue1009: because i did insult you
Sko 1: which, you are
Sko 1: so it shoulnd't be an insult
Sko 1: if you called me being a conservative, which you have, stupid and narrow minded, i dont think i would sic my friends on you
CmonVogue1009: if you really think youre a wonderful debater, try taking your argument to any sanctioned debate. try standing up for what you think tehre.
Sko 1: nor would i allow them to IM you
Sko 1: with stupid comments
CmonVogue1009: ummm i dont think i ever called you "conservative"
Sko 1: and i do
Sko 1: see you act like you know everythign about me
Sko 1: but you don't
CmonVogue1009: thats not true
Sko 1: and how do you know i don't do debate
Sko 1: in an organized event
Sko 1: you don't know
Sko 1: yet you assume
Sko 1: and you assume that i would lose simply because you are sure that you are correct in this
CmonVogue1009: im saying take your argument of "ASS PLUGGING GUYS = GROSS!!!" to an actual debate and see how embarrassed your peers will be for themselves
Sko 1: louis
Sko 1: your being kind of stupid with thaqt
Sko 1: because obviously
Sko 1: i wouldn't debate on that aspect
Sko 1: but i would go into morals and family values and all that hibber jibber
CmonVogue1009: then why are you bringing it up here in your "argument"
Sko 1: sorry, i wasn't under the impression that only formal arguments are allowed on IM
Sko 1: seeing as how this is such a premier forum for discussions as these
CmonVogue1009: thats not what im saying, you said before that "we were having a discussion when your stupid friend IMed me"
CmonVogue1009: im saying youre not discussing anything with me
CmonVogue1009: youre telling me im shameful
CmonVogue1009: thats not an argument
Sko 1: so?
Sko 1: im not allwoed to call you discusting?
Sko 1: in my opinion
Sko 1: you and i were talking
Sko 1: or arguing
Sko 1: or debating
CmonVogue1009: so dont claim youre discussing anything with me when actually youre just blacklisting me without any rhyme or reason other than "ONE MAN, ONE WOMAN, ADAM AND EVE, NOT ADAM AND STEVE"
Sko 1: or discussing
Sko 1: or whatever we were doing
Sko 1: and it was between you and i
Sko 1: and then kids come running in there
Sko 1: and annoying me
CmonVogue1009: i didnt realize it was a big deal to you
Sko 1: it is
CmonVogue1009: seeing as how youre so open to opinion
Sko 1: regardless of opinions
Sko 1: it was you and i trading opinions
Sko 1: and then an uninvited third party trounced in here trying to look like hot shit because she could fling insults around and try to call someone she's never seen nor met before a 'fucking failure'
CmonVogue1009: yes, and your opinion happened to be that you thought i led a disgusting life
Sko 1: so, i appreciate that
Sko 1: i think you're missing the point
Sko 1: at no point in this little discussion did you ask me to stop did you?
Sko 1: no, i dont think so
CmonVogue1009: the point is, expect adversarial forces when youre that determinedly an ass
CmonVogue1009: because thats what you were being, matt
Sko 1: adversarial forces
Sko 1: in the form of little girls
Sko 1: swearing at me
CmonVogue1009: thinking its cool to tell someone their lifestyle sucks is asinine
Sko 1: i didn't bring in adversarial forces to call you a cocksucker did i?
Sko 1: who says i thought it was cool>
Sko 1: maybe i;m tryign to break out of the norm and be uncool
Sko 1: but you don't know, you assume, again
CmonVogue1009: maybe you think youre hot shit and think your opinion is god's
Sko 1: it annoys me that you have to rely on little girls to insult people
CmonVogue1009: little girls?
CmonVogue1009: shes 19
Sko 1: little girls
Sko 1: she sounded pretty little to me
Sko 1: her 'argument' if you will was pretty sound i must say
CmonVogue1009: because her font was pink? did you listen to her? she was pretty well-spoken
CmonVogue1009: it wasnt an argument
CmonVogue1009: she thought you were an idiot
Sko 1: im a fucking failure and im going to fucking hell because i disagree with you
Sko 1: i dont even think i told you you're goign to hell
Sko 1: which i strongly believe is the truth, according to my religion
CmonVogue1009: why do you have a problem with what she thinks?
CmonVogue1009: who cares?
Sko 1: i dont have a problem with what she thinks
Sko 1: but now i dont even really want to talk to you
Sko 1: not because you liek plugging guys
Sko 1: but because your friend annoyed me
CmonVogue1009: well what a loss for me
Sko 1: inadvertanly though it may be, you caused me anguish
CmonVogue1009: guess ill have to go on talking to people who are comfortable with sexuality
Sko 1: and wasnt it you who initiated dialogue?
CmonVogue1009: i plan on losing sleep over it
Sko 1: so because i dont like gays
Sko 1: im not comfortable with my sexuality
Sko 1: maybe i just know where my dick belongs
Sko 1: most straight guys
Sko 1: like, 99% that i know
CmonVogue1009: "maybe i just know where my dick belongs"
Sko 1: are a bit homophobic
CmonVogue1009: uhhh thats a fallacy of logic sir
Sko 1: uhhh you would know
Sko 1: i do know where my dick belogns
Sko 1: a few places, another man's asshole is not one of them
CmonVogue1009: "belongs"... theres no doctrine saying who everyone has to fuck
Sko 1: nor is his mouth, nor his hand, nor anywhere near his person
CmonVogue1009: okay, that argument sounds sound
CmonVogue1009: good work
CmonVogue1009: youve defeated everyone
Sko 1: thanks for bringing doctrine into it
CmonVogue1009: "GAY GUYS DONT KNOW WHERE TO PUT THEIR DICKS"
CmonVogue1009: congratulations, socrates
Sko 1: did i say that genius boiy?
Sko 1: no, i saidi know where mine belongs
Sko 1: and it isn't in your asshole
Sko 1: but maybe your dick belongs someplace else
CmonVogue1009: in the stars, yes
Sko 1: i dont really care what you do with your cock, im simply tellign you what i wont do with mine
CmonVogue1009: oh really? because i seem to remember: men are not supposed to put their penis inside of other men
CmonVogue1009: that sounds familiar.
Sko 1: yea, they, a ccording to my religion, are not supposed to
Sko 1: according to simple biology
Sko 1: there is no other animal on the face of the planet who have been gay
Sko 1: other than a dog humping another dog's leg from time to time
Sko 1: that's all im saying
CmonVogue1009: nowhere when you said that did you mean religion, and if you assume everyone follows the same religion, i advise you lift up the rock youve been living under
Sko 1: nature did not intend for it to happen
CmonVogue1009: did you talk to nature?
CmonVogue1009: did nature tell you this? in an email?
Sko 1: you
Sko 1: your just
Sko 1: stupid now
CmonVogue1009: and YES, animals have been gay
Sko 1: did nature talk to me?
Sko 1: i feel stupid talking to you now
Sko 1: so i feel dirty, and stupid
Sko 1: and i still haven't insulted you
Sko 1: yet i was insulted
CmonVogue1009: youre assuming postulates about "nature" and "ethics" that arent true
CmonVogue1009: and yes youre insulting me
Sko 1: right
CmonVogue1009: and you should feel stupid. its about time you felt something.
Sko 1: yea that's intelligent
CmonVogue1009: you said your "upbringing" dictated your attitude
CmonVogue1009: and "religion"
CmonVogue1009: that was your justification
CmonVogue1009: nowhere in this was intellect
Sko 1: precedent
Sko 1: people have been using their upbringings and backgroudns to live since the begining of time
Sko 1: precedent does not warrent intellect, nor does intellect warrent how and why you live the way you do
CmonVogue1009: yes, and where has it gotten us: stooped in dogma and misconceptions
Sko 1: are you saying you're smarter than me because you're more open minded?
CmonVogue1009: im saying im more realistic
Sko 1: smarter?
Sko 1: you used intellect
Sko 1: not realism
Sko 1: so you're saying you're smarter than me
Sko 1: but, i think you're not
Sko 1: because my test scores were higher?
Sko 1: so, by textbook definition
Sko 1: my 'intellect' is higher
Sko 1: and we're goign by textbook, as you said
CmonVogue1009: now that you ask, i think im smarter than you because nowhere in my argument did i use terms like "ass pluggers" to enhance my argument
CmonVogue1009: i see, youre a real man, and thats why you use terms like that
CmonVogue1009: so youre certainly not trying to enforce your masculinity because you feel threatened
CmonVogue1009: certainly not.
CmonVogue1009: certainly not the mindset of every fucked-up homophobe.
CmonVogue1009: but i need to leave, i have two papers to do
CmonVogue1009: so we can continue this another time
CmonVogue1009: later
Remember when I thought this was my friend? Those were the days. I shouldn't have even continued talking to him; what good would it have done? And of COURSE religion is justification for demeaning someone else's lifestyle. Good. I'm glad we understand the point of religion. It's really about justifying closed-mindedness. Or feeling like we're the exalted ones among a world of miscreants. I need to do my homework.
Boo this, lovin' you still, xoxo,
Louis
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