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King of Modesty

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"I wanna be mesmerizing too" [04 Dec 2004|04:55pm]
[ mood | listless ]
[ music | Liz Phair "Canary" (what an uplifting holiday classic!) ]

Yo, real quick, here's a webpage of Iowa pictures I made...in uploading these pictures I destroyed my old geocities website, but oh well. When you click on the pictures, click on the thing that says "view full size" to see a less pixelated version of the picture. Here's the website: http://community.webshots.com/user/cmonvogue

And hey there, old friends of mine. Here we are, getting way into December, the month when first semester ends and when I get my month-long break that I'm looking forward to far too much. It's not like I have anything extraordinary to do when I'm in Lemont... I usually end up driving around Lemont blasting Alanis Morissette with the windows down (no matter how fucking cold it is...seriously, look for me on the streets, I'll be the ridiculous(ly badass) one). Anyway, in the meantime, while I still reside in the place where I'm supposed to do work, I actually don't have that much to do... I've got a speech due next Friday on a controversy of my choice and a small Lit of Rome paper I can probably get done this weekend if I'm bored enough that I actually resort to being productive. I'm doing the speech on the controversy involving team mascots with racial implications (haha, certainly not a personal issue at all!). I'm arguing that not only should we get rid of minority-exploiting mascots but also all mascots in general. Anyone want to tell me why we need mascots again? Because they're just about the most pointless thing I can think of besides Facebook. Alright, enough about that shit, let's plunge into the review... scuba-style.

The other day I performed once again at No Shame theatre. Before the show, I did my typical sit-in-the-lounge-and-speak-to-nobody bit, and I waited till Aprille took the order for the show. I signed up, took my seat in the audience in the second row, and waited with my monologue in hand. Before the show, they announced the sketches that would be included in next week's Best of No Shame, and my earlier piece totally got selected! Alright, I performed one skit and it made it into the Best of No Shame...I'd say that's pretty cool. Anyway, then they announced the skit order for that night's show, and I found out I was going ninth. A shitload of my compadres showed up to the show, namely my entire floor, a kid from my Speaking and Reading class, and even Alicia and her boyfriend came. That made me less nervous, because I know those people know me and would think my skit was funny. However, that didn't defeat that every skit before mine was one or more of the following: too random, unfunny, pointless, or trying too hard. These rules don't apply to the older guy who performed his Christmas song medley skit, that was funny...and the substitute teacher skit. Besides that though, No Shame was shit. So I went up and performed my "Eyebrow character" skit, and the response was excellent. There was one guy in the second row who apparently had a disorder or something because he decided it was time for him to laugh too hard and some of my lines so that other people probably couldn't hear the lines that followed. The skit went over really well though, and after the show, the funny old guy came up to me and asked, "I'm sorry, what is your name?" And I'm like, "Oh, Louis." He says, "Louis, what are you doing here? Your piece was brilliant</i>." I don't know what to say to things like that and so I said, "Well, I'm a journalism major, that's why I'm here." And then he goes, "Well...drop out of that." Is it a problem that people like him seriously make me wonder why I don't just go to LA, Chicago, or New York and try to make it big? I understand that's unrealistic, but aren't I supposed to be doing what I want to do? I do want to be a journalist, but I also want to be getting out there and communicating bigtime and letting everyone know who the King of Modesty is and why he's a badass. Like right now. I think I'll at least do two years at Iowa, and next summer I'm definitely taking classes at Second City (hopefully with Rachel)... but God, I love performing stuff I've written. Love being out there and giving it all I've got and basically asking everyone "What the fuck?" about whatever I want and getting back a "Yeah, WHAT THE FUCK?!" from the audience. Also after the show, Michael Tabor, who runs No Shame, came up to me and told me how much he liked my skit, which I totally appreciated. He's really funny, he's like if RJ Erffmeyer was a stand-up comedian. Just picture that for a minute. Okay moving on.

After the show and the hugs with all the people on my floor, I went back to my dorm and hung out with Maggie. We watched Boiling Points on MTV and talked about all our business once again. One thing never gets old: gossip. Oh do I love it. I might be going to hell, but it'll feel damn good on the way down. Maggie and I are both pretty antsy for break...but I think my reasons are different than hers. For all I do here (which isn't that much, sure), I really don't feel like my life is "picking up" so to speak. Like am I not involved with the right activities? I was going to do badminton, but that got sidetracked... I don't know. What do I need for this place to be fulfilling... ahh but as I check the Louis Virtel Inventory of Shit I Learned The Hard Way, it turns out that feeling unfulfilled doesn't have much to do with the outer world's lack of resources as much as it has to do with my own inability to fulfill myself. Hmmmm. Actually, that statment might have to be revised because I think I know how to fulfill myself for the most part, but I think it's that I'm not motivated enough to go out and find those resources. What is it I could possibly want? I wish I had more male friends (although my female friends here are excellent), I wish I had more...opportunities to go other places outside my dorm, more people interested in things I'm interested in...and I feel like I should be saying "BOYFRIEND" but... that's not true, I don't want one of those. Haha, better wait till they're on sale. Basically I just want to kickass to my fullest extent and have others do the same with me. And I hope there are more kickass people on the horizon. That would be delicious.

Here's the horror of the week. Alright, I was really excited on like...Tuesday and Wednesday because I decided I was going to dye my hair a darker brown, like a dark chocolate color. I was all hyped up about it. It was gonna be the first time I went out and there tried something different. Nothing could possibly go wrong. Well, Maggie, Kinzy, Kristina, and I were sitting at dinner one day...and who walks into the cafeteria...but Phil...with DARK CHOCOLATE HAIR. Okay, seriously, what the hell did I do to offend Satan that suddenly, of ALL PEOPLE, Phil decides to do exactly what I wanted to do to my hair (haha, real quick...I told Alyssa about this and she goes, laughing, "you mean...his hair isn't pink anymore?" Yay mockery of Phil). For some reason, Phil's dark hair was completely depressing to me, because one, it looked good on him and two... how about I don't want to think about that guy and I don't want people to think I copied him. After that dinner, I seriously went back to my dorm and screamed. I was having trouble taking it. I've decided I'm going to get mah hair done anyway, I don't know when, but I really want to try it out. If it's a bad idea, I want to find that out the hard way.

Ugggh, I hate feeling like nothing's going on. I hate that I'm spending my DJ time writing about nothing going on. I do talk to Rachel a lot, and that's a good thing, although she reminds me that not much is happening in Lemont and that there's no swingin' parties there I should feel like I'm missing out on. She does remind me that there's just as much bullshit in Lemont as there is out in here in Iowa, so that's reassuring/too bad. What I do look forward to doing is hanging out next week with some of mah girls (namely Maggie and Kinga) at Starbucks next week in addition to a big mall trip next Saturday. I still need to buy my brother Greg a Christmas present since he's my Secret Santa thing. I think I may go and buy him a DVD he doesn't have... the original plan was to get him a dolphin shirt, but apparently my mom, Greg's godmother, and everyone else in the world already thought of that. I wonder which of my immediate family members drew my name... could it be Mark, the unassuming, bastardly younger brother? Or what about Jim, the intense, intelligent older brother? What about dad? Mom? Colonel Mustard? Or what about Jerry, the lost Virtel brother? I sense a gift certificate in the works for me.

I'm really in the mood to slash the rest of my FLEX dollars on a giant IMU binge involving Pizza Hut, and a strawberry smoothie. I haven't had one of those beautiful smoothies since the day I went with Alyssa to see John Edwards speak. Renee from Courses-In-Common totally had a smoothie the other day and I forced her to share it with me because I'm dangerous during withdrawls. Argggh the day is getting darker, and that means it's getting to that part of the afternoon where everything feels dead and I don't want to do anything. Oh well, guess I'll have to give in and just do nothing once again. Okay, really, what the fuck is going on here? Why am I not having an awesome time here in Iowa? Why am I not expanding and opening doors for myself and raising the bar on my own coolness? Why am I dreading just to live in the moment and confront circumstances for what they are? Why am I just...blah? I feel like going out right now, I don't want to be sitting in the dorms. Actually, I think I'm going to go down to the IMU for the hell of it. Sweet old me. Go Louis.

As for y'all, it's gettin' to be Christmas time, so it's the perfect time of year to stop shuddering at the thought of being on the same ground as everyone else. Connection is key during this time of year, so let's continue to do our best to be out there and receptive and unafraid of building bridges with others. Let's be vulnerable, accepted, accepting, comfortable with our weaknesses, and all up in our individualities. And for the love of God, let's have a good time.

Love you guys, xoxo,
Louis.

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