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Joan Baez "The Night They Drove Ole Dixie Down" |
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Howdy once again, my fellow Americans. I join you on a Friday evening in typical "ohhh my God, everything is boring" mode. As if you're not already accustomed to my mess of a life. What am I talking about? My life is so not a mess. It's actually a completely sane thing wrapped in occasional spurts of chaos. Chaos and... laziness and restlessness. It's like the story of suburban life, basically.
I got a super-thin envelope from Depaul Theatre today, which of course meant the best. I say "best" meaning "not best at all." Alas, my admission into their program was not meant to be. Rejected. Sigh. Definitely disappointing, but now that I think about it, I wouldn't have gone there if I'd gotten accepted. My mom says to me after we both know I'm not accepted, "Well, good. I almost want to call them and tell them thank you because they think they're hot stuff." Gloria's been pretty adamant about not liking Depaul Theatre since the start, so her comment wasn't too unexpected, I guess. I wouldn't call being rejected discouraging so much as I'd call it like... a little bit of an ego hit. Then again, yesterday's lit fest was a virtual ego smackdown for me...after three years of nabbing some of the bigger prizes, I received only an honorable mention this year. Other LHSers represented though, such as Rachel and Lauren with their Critics Choices, so at least Oswego and Batavia didn't completely own the damn contest. The poetry judge's balls were almost totally bulging out of his fucking tight-and-ugly pants as he sat at the front of the Evergreen Park gym...Andriana, the chica sitting next to me, laughed out loud at him, and suddenly he was trying to cover them. Thinking about it now, I was destined to not have my work liked by this judge... the winning poem was called "Ode to my Spoons". It's about time that poetic ramblings about silverware finally got some respect, or something. Emily Dickinson bargained for that for years.
Alright, in an hour I'm seeing The Dawn of the Dead with Elyse, Dan, Erin, Brad, and Shanna. Is there no such thing anymore as a horror movie that isn't a remake? I swear to God at one time people wrote new story lines for these things. Halloween, Scream, yeah I remember those. Maybe it was just a dream. No, they exist, I'm sure of it. Watch, twenty years from now they'll be remaking I Know What You Did Last Summer like it was Casablanca or something. Ingrid Bergman, Jennifer Love Hewitt...no difference really, let's be honest with ourselves.
My mom took me to Target (the store of dreams) and Starbucks just now too. Guess we're organizing a trip to U of Iowa and Columbia too. Columbia is probably my first choice college, realistically. It's in Chicago, it's got everything I want to study, it's near home, it's cute from what I hear. All those things add up to a great college, I'm sure. Wherever I go, I'll have the time of my life and kick some ass as I do it, so game on.
In the meantime, I've got 5-6 months before college becomes the present. So what do I do during this time of listlessness and anxiety and... graduation? Well, I'm going to get in touch with the more masculine parts of myself (don't kid yourself, they exist) and enjoy things like competition, video games, and television. At the same, definitely have to keep in mind the sentimental and emotional parts of myself: aka the journal, the poetry (which really should be happening...any minute now...maybe another month), the appreciation, the love of the people around me, the expressing that love, the getting to know more people and embracing those people, and the gradual diminishing of the hurt that lingers behind me. I'm already light years in the right direction, and the summer will kick so much ass. My graduation party is completely scheduled...me and good ole cousin Tiffany are having our party together. She's gonna be a cosmetologist, and a sexy-streetsmart-no-bullshit-sassy one at that. I love Tiffany, and thank God she loves me too. We continue to rock.
And so do you. Pizza time, I'll be in touch again soon, maybe I'll have a treat for you. A cyber Snickers bar or something. Later, people, I continue to love each and every one of you, thanks for listening, I continue to be grateful.
There with you,
Louis.
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